Mama Thoughts

Oi vei! What a holiday.  :) Yanik and I cooked for 2 days together and hosted last night.  What an incredible night.  We did the tradition of where everyone goes around the table and shares what they are thankful for... and as is typical in the Soviet Jewish experience, most people thanked this country of ours and all of the services and comforts which it has provided to our parents and our grandparents. The food was really really good.  My feet were also really really swollen by the end of the day... so once dinner hit the table I pretty much parked my tuchus in a chair and watched everyone run around and do everything. This is where I get to gush about my family and my new family and how incredible everyone is. My mom brought over "sirniki" made from her homemade tvorog.  My brother called to check in and make sure all was well.  My dad and Galia were up and cleaning the whole night through.  My in-laws brought over laundered and ironed clothe...

Or what's left.   :)

This might not ever happen.  That's how I feel today.  I'm used to the lack of sleep, and nothing much else has changed... so I've settled into my new normal.  Everything is just really consistent from day to day... which doesn't really make me think that things are changing in any direction.  This weekend with Thanksgiving and Channukah and family and Latke Fest might get things moving... but I'm just not sure.  I just feel extra large but other than that fine... which is a great place to be I suppose. :) 

What the heck is a winter melon?? That is the size of the kiddo this week.  Things are starting to happen pretty quick at this point. I went to go visit BB and the new baby.  So little!  The heads are always what freak me out at this point.  Every newborn... my eyes go straight to the circumference of that head and I start thinking logistics.  BB's baby seems manageable.  So that's a great thing. :)    I held the little guy and he draped over my ginormous belly... and apparently my little lady wanted to say hello (or goodbye) and started kicking up through to the little one resting.  Those little people are so interesting!  The comments at work are getting more and more ridiculous as well.  This week I got "everytime I see you I feel the urge to go run and boil water," "you are wider than you are tall," and from a student "seriously... you should be at home, I worry when I see you."  :)  I actually feel pretty good.  ...

So yesterday we had a day of cleaning.  I had a firm desire to clean.  Was this nesting? I have no idea.  Maybe I just really wanted to clean up shop?  I woke up in the middle of the night full of energy and ready to go... then had to make myself go back to sleep.  Again... nesting? Or just the inability to sleep due to weird dreams?  I have no idea. Contractions.  I think I get them occasionally.  Or... is it just the kid swishing around in there doing olympic tricks?  I have no idea.  I've never done this before.  It's all well and good to google "what does a contraction feel like" but then you get crazy ladies who spend all of their days on forums making up crazy answers to crazy questions.  It's better to stay away from things like that in my humble opinion. So I just mosey along.  Not really certain of what's going on... but overall still enjoying things.  I like the flipping.  I like the hiccups (most ...

Crazy week at work.  I'm having this wierd thing happen where I know I'm going to be gone, so on one hand I'm feeling like I need to detach more and more... but when things get tumultuous I am always ready to jump into the fire... so I have to wrestle with myself.  Control is a thing I know I have to let go of as a parent.  I know that it isn't going to be so simple and that things are going to get crazy and curveballs will be thrown... and I'll have to deal.  It will be very strange coming back in the spring having not been part of the crazy for 12 weeks.  Especially in a time of change and transition.  It will all be fine in the end... I have to keep telling myself this.  Nothing will fall apart.  My maternity sub is an incredible find, he's a wonderfully zen man who was a teacher at North and is definitely ready to handle things, especially with my wonderful secretary at his side.  All will be well.  I have to let go.  All will b...

It's so interesting watching my family go through the preparation stages for this little lady.  Everyone reacts in their own way, and it's such a learning experience to watch them and learn more about the people that are closest to you in your life.  Some people worry, some are just super excited, some are a little uncomfortable about the significance of another generation being added to the family and where that leaves their generation.  Everyone has also been pretty good about only giving advice when solicited... that's impressive to me!  They're all very eager to help in different ways as well! I'm lucky to have three sets of doting grandparents for this little lady, and since the one thing I'm a little worried about is losing my mind in seclusion once Yanik goes back to work... I hope that these folks will come round and keep the two ladies company on walks in the winter.  We have so much stuff, but the most important thing for me really is to have "pr...

Huh? How did this happen specifically? Although March was a long long time ago theoretically, it did fly by!  On one hand it feels like the day before my birthday almost every day... and I have around 4 weeks of this left... so that can get old, on the other hand all of the ladies that are due before me have delivered (yay for BB!!), and so things are getting very very real.  The good news is that I feel ready.  We finished our classes, we took an extra one (that wasn't really needed), and all we have left is to pack the bag for the hospital. Now the downside... I could use a little more sleep.  I know that this is one of the cruelest jokes that mother nature has in store for me.  The whole waking up 4 times a night thing is getting pretty old and might be the thing that wears me down the quickest.  At least I'm good at falling straight back to sleep!  I know things won't really be much better once the baby comes... but at least I won't be working ...

I made a concerted effort to not plan us into a corner this month.  November is our last month to really have ourselves to ourselves and I made sure not to plan tons and tons of activities ahead of time.  It's really kind of lovely. Of course we're still going to walk a 5K tomorrow and see family and the ginormous group of friends occasionally, but it's still so nice to have lazy mornings that don't really demand the "get up and move" mentality. On the baby front we are also slowing down with the plans.  We're done with Denyse Ffrench's class (which I would recommend to any couple having a baby), we took Newborn boot camp at the hospital, we did laundry, we installed a car seat, and now we have 4 weeks (give or take) to just wait. LLP is moving around in a much more direct kind of way, kneeing and elbowing her way around, and reacting to the things going on around her.  She loves the movie theater, sitting after dinner, and dancing to NPR in the c...

My brilliant friend Becky introduced this concept to me, and I think it's time that we implement the idea of a no-birth present.  The excitement and "looking forward" energy can be a little much, and each week seems like it's right around the corner, and then you realize "oh wait... there's another month!" and it just seems crazy.  So!  No-Birth Presents!  I'm going to schedule something lovely and fancy for myself each week of pregnancy that remains... and if I don't go into labor, it will be like a gift or goal to look forward to.  It's such a strange concept to want this thing that has to come out to get bigger before it comes out... I want this little lady to be strong and have great brain and lung development... but this sucker still has to come barreling out... and that makes me nervous at times.  But I think we'll be alright.  If little ladies that I know did it... then there must be a reason that Hashem gave me these big ol' ...

This child has a diaphragm that loves to spasm.  At least 2-4 times per day she gets hiccups.  And they always make me smile.  It's just really fun to watch my belly twitch knowing that there's a baby girl in there probably confused as to why she has the hiccups again.  I remember getting the hiccups a lot as a little lady, and I still get them every time I drink something carbonated.  It's good to know she gets a little something from her mama.  :)