Letting Go

This weekend in yoga there was a substitute teacher.  It wasn't an incredible class, however she started off with a quote to set the tone and this particular one stuck with me throughout the practice, and even on my ride home.

"It doesn't take a lot of strength to hang on.  It takes a lot of strength to let go."

I've been struggling with a bunch of things where this could apply.   I have been given a whole lot of unsolicited advice as of late that has ticked me off to the Nth degree (people think that giving advice to pregnant women is a super idea... I would like to take a moment to assure them otherwise).  I've been carrying around a whole lot of bitterness and resentment regarding this advice.  It's time to let go.

Pregnancy itself this time around has been significantly more achy and it occurred much earlier in the pregnancy.  My pelvis and hips and ligaments and hamstrings feel very often as if they are hanging out by a very thin little thread (aka my round ligaments).  I've allowed myself to be more whiny than usual about this.  This makes me feel weak and not like the superwoman I felt like the first time around... also very frustrating.  Time to let go here as well.

And finally... I've been hanging on to my routines and my child and not taking particularly good care of myself as of late.  It's time to let go of that as well.  The past few weeks I've actually made some big steps towards this.  I went out to LA and got some R&R.  I made sure to schedule a massage for myself.  I've been walking and moving around more.  I got my ass to prenatal yoga and have resolved to continue doing this until this child is out.  I won't be able to take care of anyone, let alone birth someone unless I take care of me first for a little bit.  I have to let go and take care of me.

So here we go.  It's the return of the zen Jessica.  It's time to prep.  I'm officially on the third trimester and it's time to get into the headspace of letting go.  The only thing that got me through childbirth the first time was the ability to let go of the moment, let go of the pain, and focus on the place within, on the drishti beyond.  Here's to 12 weeks filled with hippy-dippy me time, closely followed up by 24 months of nursing, diapering, and sleep training.  :)


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